Infertility Authors & Experts Interview: Jill Blakeway, Author of Making Babies

Q&A WITH JILL BLAKEWAY

Question: What inspired you to write Making Babies: A Proven 3-month Program for Maximum Fertility?

Answer: I wrote Making Babies with an MD because we wanted to combine our knowledge and experience into a comprehensive plan. That way we could give our patients and our readers the best of Eastern and Western medicine.Question: We followed your “fertility boot camp” when we headed down the in vitro route, including a reduction in strenuous exercise, acupuncture and nutrition.  

Question: Do you have a cheat sheet that our readers can follow to maximize their fertility?

Answer: One of the main messages of Making Babies is that there is no one-size-fits-all method of getting pregnant. In the book we created five fertility types for both men and women. Each type follows a slightly different plan in order to maximize their chances of conceiving. But the cheat sheet I give my patients is as follows:

  • Eat whole foods and minimize your intake of processed foods. Make sure you get enough lean protein, some whole grains and lots and lots of colorful fruits and vegetables. Cut back on coffee and alcohol and cut out bad habits like smoking.
  • Find a way to manage stress. Acupuncture is a good way to offset the effects of stress on reproductive hormones.
  • Understand your cycle and get help to correct hormone imbalances. Chinese medicine can be a great way to regulate a cycle.
  • Get your timing right (there’s lots of advice about this in the book)
  • Make sure you take steps to improve pelvic circulation. The self-massages in Making Babies are particularly good for this.
  • Make sure your doctor tests you for common fertility problems and some uncommon ones if you’ve been trying to conceive for a while. The tests you need are all outlined in the book.You can also find your fertility type here. 

Question: Of all the advice in your book, what’s the biggest takeaway for women trying to get pregnant?

Answer: That the things you do to support your general health such as eating well, taking supplements, getting an appropriate amount of exercise, receiving acupuncture, etc. will all enhance your fertility.

Question: You’ve recently published a new book, Sex Again: Recharging Your Libido. I love that there are “He Said” boxes written by your husband.  What was that process like, collaborating on a book together?

Answer: It was fun. I’ve been married to my husband for a long time but I was still surprised by some of the things he said in the “He Says” section of the book. The book is for couples that want to revive their libido.  It’s based on some ancient Taoist texts brought right up to date for modern couples. My husband’s contribution was vital because we’re both practitioners of Chinese medicine but we see the Taoist texts quite differently because men and women see sex differently.

Question: You and your husband work together as well. Your NYC clinic is such a unique complementary medical center. Where did the idea for opening the YinOva Center come from?

Answer: The YinOva Center really evolved. We simply set out to give our patients the best care we could and the center grew by word of mouth. These days it’s one of the biggest Chinese medicine practices in the country.  We added services because our patients asked for them so these days we have 10 acupuncturists/herbalists, a naturopath, a massage therapist, a nutritionist, a yoga teacher, a social worker and Pilates teacher. The whole team works together to provide our patients with comprehensive complementary medical care.

Question: How did you find the time to run a medical center and write books too? 

Answer: Frankly, I have a wonderful team so at this point, I’m not running everything. Everyone at YinOva cares deeply about our mission to provide people with great health care. Giving people access to information about their health is part of that mission. So writing books, along with our blog and the work we do on social media, are all ways we connect with people. To be honest it’s fun and it doesn’t feel like work. 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

YinOva founder Jill Blakeway is a licensed and board certified acupuncturist, clinical herbalist, and both a highly skilled and an empathic and intuitive practitioner. She is also an author and speaker. She specializes in the care of women and children, and in particular in using Chinese medicine to enhance fertility and fertility treatments. Her work helping women achieve a healthy pregnancy inspired the New York Times to call her one of the city’s top acupuncturists and a “fertility goddess.”

Follow Jill on Facebook and Twitter

Infertility Authors & Experts Interview Series: Marc Sedaka, Author of What He Can Expect When She's Not Expecting

                                      Website: http://whathecanexpect.com/

                                      Website: http://whathecanexpect.com/

 

Q&A with Marc Sedaka

Question: What inspired you to write What He Can Expect When She's Not Expecting?

Answer: Plain and simple, it was the book I wish I had read when my wife and I were suffering with infertility (for 7 years).  As I’m sure you know, there are plenty of books geared towards women, but none at the time were geared towards men.  And since we represent 50% of married sufferers, I thought it was high time someone did something about that.  It was also a way to impart my wisdom and, quite frankly, let other husbands learn from my mistakes.

Question: Was writing the book different in any way from your experiences writing for TV and film?

Answer: In many ways it was more fun and more rewarding.  Not only did I have a great deal of passion for the subject, but I knew that, in the end, I would be helping people overcome a major life crisis.  Also, even though it was a “serious” book, I still tried to infuse as much of my comedy background as possible.  My wife likes to describe it as the written equivalent of taking a guy to a bar and telling him everything he needs to know (and probably never wanted to know) about infertility.

Question: What was the toughest part of your infertility journey?

Answer: Without question, seeing my wife lose her sense of self.  With every failure it was as if a part of her died, and that was very difficult to take.  

Question: What is your favorite advice to give to men dealing with the craziness of trying to get pregnant?

Answer: Men should know that they can play a role in all this even if it doesn’t always seem like they can.  Even something as simple as going to the appointments with your wife shows your support and your solidarity.  This isn’t HER problem and she should never be made to feel like it is.

Question: You wrote a children’s book with your dad. How did that come about and what was that experience like?

Answer: The project actually started out as a children’s album when my girls were about two years old.  My father (Neil Sedaka) decided he wanted to write children’s lyrics for some of his early hits and I agreed to collaborate.  Shortly thereafter, a publisher approached us about turning some of the lyrics into books, and from that, Dinosaur Pet (based on my father’s song “Calendar Girl”) was born.  The whole project has really been a joy.  My kids sang background vocals on the original album and we still go to signings and reading whenever we can.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Marc Sedaka has written scripts for Disney, New Line, Fox, Paramount, and Warner Bros. His most notable feature credit is the romantic comedy “Overnight Delivery”, which stars Reese Witherspoon and Paul Rudd. On the TV front, he has written for such shows as NBC’s “Inside Schwartz” and CBS’s “King Of Queens.” He is also an award-winning New York Times best-selling author of children’s and self-help books. When not writing, Marc teaches screenwriting at UCLA, Columbia College, and Laureate University. Learn more about Marc at whathecanexpect.com.

 

5 Things NEVER to Say to a Couple Trying to Conceive

The advice came pouring in as soon as everyone knew we were trying to get pregnant. It didn't bother me at first, but the longer we tried to get pregnant with no luck, the more frustrating it became. If you have friends or family trying to conceive, here's what NOT TO SAY to the fertility-challenged:

#1: God has a plan.

#2: Don't stress, it will all work out.

#3: You just need to go on vacation and eat some ice cream.

#4: Oh well, kids can be a pain in the a@@ anyway. 

#5: Are you sure you're doing it right?

What is okay to say? I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. I’m thinking of you. I’m here for you.

For those of you on the receiving end of the advice, keep in mind that most people are genuinely trying to be helpful, not hurt your feelings.

Funny Moments During Our Infertility Saga

You'll notice a theme here. Can you guess who the funny one is in this relationship?

#5. Chris playfully pretended to get up on the doctor's table and then freaked out when he realized there were metal stirrups under the colorful striped socks. I've never seen him move so fast or look so sheepish.

#4. Chris and Sydney had left me to be sewn up after the c-section and my OB said, "What was his height again?" Wait, what? His? I asked frantically, "It is a girl, right?" (I did not find this at all funny at the time! Don't mess with a woman who has her entire uterus outside her body!)

#3. Our cats decided to do a high wire act on our bed frame while we were trying to conceive. They definitely did not want us to have children. Now we see why. Cat tails are to toddlers like catnip is to cats.

#2. Chris decided it would be fun to create his own carnival ride on the doctor's chair, spinning round and round and round. He started turning green just as the doctor walked in. He jumped up so fast that he almost fell over. Dr. Vaughn raised his eyebrows, shook his head slightly, sighed (feeling a little worried for me having another child besides Chris?), and then moved on to the business at hand. 

#1. And the funniest moment of our saga... While we were waiting for the doctor, Chris turned the lights out, turned on the little flashlight connected to the table facing it toward my eyes, and screamed "WHERE ARE THE PLANS? WHERE ARE THE PLANS?" in his best German accent. I can't imagine what those nurses thought was going on in our room.

What's the funniest moment of your infertility saga?